Monday, December 17, 2012

It's a New Post! Plus...Meet Baby Vash! ^_^

So....first, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!  As with many in the US, my thoughts, prayers, and tears are with Newtown, CT, and Sandy Hook Elementary School.  It's unimaginable to think what those kids and families are coping with, and there truly are no right words one can say.

It's been a while since I've written about writing.  Since finishing my absolute final draft of The Arrival, I've been in a lull.  My focus has been on my one page synopsis and individualizing query letters, and while I've read bits and pieces of #2 and jotted notes for #3, I haven't set aside any time to write.  I've wanted to, really.  Temptation seems to draw me elsewhere.

For instance, the sequel to Dead Island, Dead Island Riptide (mature content), will allow players to carry over their inventory from a saved game.  Awesome!  I love seeing game publishers reward loyalty with perks like this.  However, after finishing the game the first time, I started a new game...which also allowed me to keep my inventory...and then stopped some point after reaching the city.  I'm certain I was pulled away to finish Assassin's Creed Brotherhood so I could start Assassin's Creed Revelations...but, long story short (too late! - Clue), I picked up Dead Island again to finish it with intentions on rushing through to get it done and have my inventory.  Only...I forgot how much fun the game is and keep slumming around the city and island in search of items I don't really need.  :-/  At least I've made it to the jungle, so I'm not too far off from the end.  Call me a fan of large, immersible worlds in which I can roam to my heart's content while felling zombies with my flaming (or electrified) machete.

Alas!  My large, immersible world doesn't need zombies to hold my attention.  Assassin's Creed does a wonderful job as well and I never tire of searching for treasure or taking over the Templar strongholds and running over rooftops.  Fans of the series can guess that I've reached beyond Brotherhood into Revelation.  I have until sometime in 2013 to finish Dead Island, but I think Santa is bringing me Assassin's Creed III and I cannot wait!  Temptation from writing #1 = video games.

Since having my surgery in November, I've spent time in bed watching anime and reading manga, too.  I bought season two for Black Butler, which received mixed reviews from fans, and dug in to the meat of the set.  I have yet to watch the bonus material.  I also re-watched the Trigun series and have started Hellsing Ultimate, which I got for my birthday.  As for BB #2...I can't say that I saw where a lot of the negative reviews I read were coming from, but I felt it was a rushed season that held promise.  It got dirtier and grittier than the original, which I liked, but I wish more time and care had been taken to make it cohesive.  It's a fine addition any fan's collection, but it could have been more than it is.  Of course, the original season, when compared to the books, also could have been more than it was.  Hellsing, as any fan could and should expect, is spectacular, and I am only too happy to listen to Crispin Freeman's voice.  I do like how this one follows the books, unlike the original.  Some time has passed between watching the original, reading the books, and seeing this, so there were parts I looked forward to that that never came to be.  My only complaint is that same complaint I had with the books - the Major talks too much!  Ugh.  It sucked to read the accent and now it sucks to listen to him yammer on.  Shut him up and give Crispin more lines!  But that's minor, really.  I have yet to finish it or watch the remainder of the material that came with the sets.  Otherwise recent manga acquisitions include Bleach, Vampire Knight, Sailor Moon, and Black Butler.  Temptation from writing #2 = anime and manga.

And then...while researching an agent, I discovered one of his clients and rushed out to the store to buy her book.  It's the first time I've ever purchased a hard-cover book (non text book) and the first time in recent memory that a "real" book has captured my attention - let alone a YA novel.  Now, I am thoroughly contented with manga counting as real books, but others consider them glorified comics, so...hence "real" book.  Rachel Hartman's Seraphina - check it out.  Temptation from writing #3 = reading "real" books.

Of course, then there's the new baby in the house...Vash (the Stampede) - yes, an obvious homage to Trigun's main character, to which I also pay homage in my second manuscript.  He's a whopping 9 weeks old and sweet as can be, with an unusual black smoke pattern (black stripes and swirls over nearly-black fur).  He can be a hellion when he's awake - I took a kitten-size Chuck Norris round house to the nose the other night.  There's a picture of Vash below.  We chose to name him from Trigun in memory of Neko, who was loosely named after the Kuro Neko (black cat) in Trigun.  Temptation from writing #4 = kitten.

Finally, I don't know where I've been for the last few years, but I'm in love with Castle.  I first fell "in love" with Nathan Fillion when he was Johnny on Two Guys and Girl and a Pizza Place and have seen him in other offerings since (to include Captain Hammer in Dr. Horrible's Sing-along Blog).  Temptation from writing #5 = Nathan Fil...I mean...Castle.

Now I'm blogging instead of writing, even while thinking about how much I want to write.  It's funny, in a way, since I'm technically writing...  I don't believe one should force oneself to write.  I believe it can result in stilted, uninspired writing.  However, I'm not sure what to make of these feelings that I want to write, but don't or can't or won't.  I listen to music that I know will inspire the story to flow through me, which works, but I still don't get on the laptop.  I jot down notes in my notebook and get all fired up...but my manuscript remains untouched.  I play scenes through my head and focus on Alex, a character who exists in the first manuscript but isn't introduced until the second story, and where I now want to take him...but he stands still as ink on paper.  Why is this?  Have I subconsciously decided that all energy needs to go into my agent hunt, leaving none for my other projects?  Perhaps I worry that diverting attention away from the agent hunt will interfere.  But that makes little sense when I literally send out one or two queries at a time and research one or two agents afterward in anticipation of the next round.  Well, I've sent another query off and have an idea of someone I'd like to reach out to next...but I have to decide if I want to wait for a particular agent who isn't accepting queries right now, or write to one in the agency who is.  I understand that querying an agency can be, but usually isn't, the same as querying an individual agent, so I have to weigh my pros and cons. 

Sometimes I wonder if I should stop being old fashioned and just send out a bunch of queries...but then I remember that personalized rejections can offer insight and are worth waiting for.  I've probably mentioned before that I've trained myself to expect rejections.  It makes them easier to handle.  But this time, I think given my excitement over the book I found, I have a spark of hope that I am trying desperately to snuff.  After I received my first rejection, I wandered around my garden for about an hour, singing a song over and over in my head, trying to convince myself that it wasn't a big deal.  It was just the first one.  There would be many others.  But, it was the first one and it did hurt.  It's perfectly fine to be disappointed that an agent I liked sent me a rejection, but when I really want that agent to see the potential of my story and feel that hope growing...I know I'm going to feel that hurt again.  That's the life of a writer, though.  Just how it is.  And I'd never give it up.

I love my characters.  I love their world.  I love spending time with them, both the good and the bad, the happy and the gutwrenching.  I love that two and a half novels have spilled from my mind to paper, allowing me to share them with people close to me.  I even love that uncertainty of putting them out in the world for judgment. 



  

3 comments:

Searching for the Story said...

I would disagree on the whole forcing yourself to write thing. Sometimes the only way to get a project done is to get it done.

Whenever I'm working on something I allocate a certain amount of time every night and make myself write for that time.

Kastie Pavlik said...

Thank you so much for your feedback. I can't tell you how excited I got when I saw you commenting on my blog. Yay! I'm hoping that's a good sign...^_-

I do agree with you - and not just to agree with you - in a sense. I think prioritizing has to come into play somewhere. Right now the agent hunt has my focus, so when I'm able to focus on writing, I write. Sometimes I sit down to write and search for agents instead...and then I find one, which sparks research and write a new query letter mode.

I didn't have this trouble with the first two manuscripts. They flowed right out - but I was also just editing and it was easier to focus on both. I suppose there will always be some reason behind an excuse...but when I find an agent (hint? :-)) I know that will light a fire and get me going again.

Plus I've determined part of the block to come from writing from new character perspectives. I don't know them as well, so spending time in thought, thinking like them, seeing scenes play out as them - all helps in the long run.

Thanks again!

Searching for the Story said...

Well, you definitely want to have your manuscript done before you seek an agent. That way if they like your idea they can fly right through the book.